Parabolic Language

Is “parabolic” a word?

Yes, it is, but not in the sense I would like it to be for the purposes of this blog!  We’re in the summer months of Ordinary Time, and especially in Year A (this year’s cycle), we’re hearing a lot of parables about the Kingdom of God.  Jesus told parables to make things easier for merely human minds to comprehend.  After all, the true nature of God, and of Jesus Christ possessing both a fully human and fully divine nature, is hard for us to wrap our heads around.  Some older Catholics might recall being told, “It’s a mystery!  We’re not meant to understand it.”  But, Jesus tries to make it easier for us to try to understand by putting heavenly realities into earthly context.

This past Sunday, we heard about the weeds and the wheat, the mustard seed, and yeast leavening dough.  The week before, we heard about different kinds of soil.  But it goes beyond the physical elements of each simile.  As Father Erik mentioned in his homily on Sunday, It’s not about the seed itself.  It’s not about the soil.  It’s about our souls and the being open to God’s Word at work in our lives.

This is what I would like to call parabolic language!  It isn’t hyperbolic – making something grander than it actually is.  it’s making things more relatable!

Kindred Spirits in a Time of Pandemic

Okay, I’ll admit it, I’m a millennial.  I grew up in the time of almost nobody having a computer at home, and now, almost everyone has one.  I still marvel at the fact that schools now are working toward a one-to-one student-to-device ratio, because that’s just how education works right now (especially with online learning and home-based instruction).  When I was in elementary school, first at Cosgriff and then at the Madeleine Choir School shortly after it opened, “computer class” was Oregon Trail, and typing games, and that was pretty much it.  When I got to high school at Judge, the library had two rows of big chunky iMac computers.  I didn’t have e-mail until college, and I didn’t have social media until my second year of undergrad.  Now, technology has taken over almost everyone’s lives, right down to toddlers who can navigate an iPhone.  Life moves pretty fast sometimes.

When I was growing up, “screen time” wasn’t a thing.  If someone referred to screen time it meant how long a certain actor was actually on-screen during a movie or television show.  Now, that phrase is used to refer to the amount of time people spend on the computer or looking at their mobile device.  I’ll admit, I spend way too much of my time engaged in “screen time.”  I can justify some of it as necessary to do my job, but a lot of it, I could probably do without.

But even with its definite downsides, technology can serve to connect us during times of social isolation, like the last several months have been.  It can serve to create a virtual community.  It can connect us to our “brick and mortar” communities when we aren’t able to visit them in the physical world.  One can also find groups of like-minded people to connect with.  An example of this is Fr. Gray’s morning coffees with his St. Mary’s parishioners in Park City over Facebook Live.  Using technology to build community rather than to escape from it is a wonderful thing.

At St. Ambrose, we on staff have been working hard since the pandemic restrictions really began to impact our city and state to keep people connected to the parish through social media and YouTube Masses.  We are learning and evolving together.  Let us hope and pray that technology will help us to remain kindred spirits in community even during isolation.

Imposing Self-Discipline, Even When It’s Hard

A lot of us are working from home now, or we are finding ourselves with an abundance of time on our hands while we are furloughed or looking for work.  It can be difficult to find the motivation to keep at it when we don’t have a supervisor or the need to go further than our home office to do our work.  I will say, I have enjoyed being at home for two reasons.  First, I don’t have to pack my lunch every day, and second, there is no commute, no matter how long or short.  When I’m ready to start work, I just do. 

But it can also be difficult to focus on work when there are so many distractions typical of being at home.  Yes, I don’t have to pack a lunch to take to work with me, but I have to be cognizant of how long I am taking for a lunch “break”.  The TV is right there, ever so inviting.  Yes, there is no commute, but do I spend more time being distracted by my phone while I’m getting “ready to start” in the morning?  (The answer, unfortunately, is yes.)

The same can be said for our current worship situation.  Do we take advantage of the fact that we don’t have to worry about getting to church and we can just watch it on EWTN or online?  Do we not make it into a time of prayer?  Are we extra distracted during Mass because all those things that need doing at home are literally right there in front of us?  Be aware of your distractions.  Have some self-awareness of what your main “triggers” are when it comes to losing focus, and try to reduce those triggers.  I know it’s hard.  I’m not saying I’m perfect when it comes to ignoring my own triggers, but I keep trying.

Set goals.  Make lists.  Change up your environment, if you can.  Make a holy space at home.  Make a point of dressing for church, even if you are “going to Mass” in your living room or on your mobile device.  Act like someone is watching you, because someone is.  And if you stumble, it’s okay.  Try, try again.  Nobody is perfect, but that doesn’t mean we can’t strive to be the best we can be each day.

Self-Examination and Discovery

As we continue to navigate the ever-changing situation that the COVID-19 pandemic presents us, there are many changes we have to make, and most likely, there will be many more to come.  Personally, I relocated most of the essential materials from my office at St. Ambrose to my home this week.  I am lucky in that most of my job can be done remotely, and those things that can’t be done remotely could be completed quickly with a visit to the office once a week.  In the process of deciding what should come with me and what should stay, I had to do some examination of my work habits.

I am, by nature, a creature of habit.  I had luckily built in a lot of the framework I would have needed to switch to working remotely long ago, and I had migrated a lot of my computer files to a portable machine earlier this year.  My weeks are very structured when it comes to what must be done each day.  This has been helpful in keeping up with what day it is in general and I haven’t experienced too much sense of one day bleeding into another and forgetting where I am in the week.

So, for me, the switch to working from home didn’t come with too many hiccups, but it did come with a healthy dose of self-examination and discovery.  Where previously my brother and I had been working outside the home and our parents were holding the fort in their retirement, now “the kids” are both home all the time.  It’s been an adjustment for my dad in particular, having everyone around all the time.  But we’ve all carved out our own spaces in the house, and if we ever need to self-isolate, even in the same house, it won’t be too much of an issue to do so.

I did realize that I have to have a relatively clean and organized area to work in.  I’m not too proud to admit my room is typically pretty disorderly.  Now, with me working there, I found very quickly that I needed to clean up.  Still, I find myself glancing up to check the calendar where it is in my office and it isn’t there, because I’m not in my office.  And I’ve found that I am actually more productive if I set boundaries and expectations for myself.  For example, if I would typically put in a set number of hours in my work day, I set a timer for that long.  I allow myself to stop and take breaks, go outside for a walk around the neighborhood, but the hours must get done, not to mention all those tasks that I am able to do remotely.

It is definitely an exercise in discipline, but I think I will come out the other side of this situation with a more streamlined approach to my daily work.  And of course, prayer is a part of my days each and every day.  I ask for strength and perseverance to get through each day and to maintain my focus.  So far, I’ve been successful.

If you have recently shifted your work situation or environment, have you made any discoveries about yourself you didn’t realize before?  How are you making the best of your current situation?

Sledding in the Dark

There is a prime sledding hill within walking distance from my house.  It is, in my opinion, one of the best sledding hills in the Salt Lake Valley, and no, it isn’t located at Sugarhouse Park.  The reason I feel it is one of the best hills is because it offers something for everyone.  At the eastern end of the hill, it is steep and bumpy – perfect for the thrill-seeking older sledding enthusiast.  As you move west, the hill gets progressively easier – less steep and definitely less bumpy – so it’s great for little kids who might get scared at the eastern end.  I remember sledding there as a kid, and I would always grumble when Mom or Dad said it was time to go home because it was getting dark.  But, as is usually the case, Mom and Dad knew best.

If you drive by this hill after a decent snowfall, you will see cars lined up all along the hill and kids (and adults) of all ages on the slope.  In the past two years or so, there has even been a diehard group that goes to the sledding hill after dark.  I noticed them back again just last week.

Just think of the motivation and enthusiasm these people must have to go sledding in the dark.  They also have to have a significant amount confidence and trust that nothing will go seriously wrong.  Yes, they could use the headlights of their cars to light the way, but they are essentially sledding blind.

Try now to put this in the context of the apostles.  We heard of the calling of Andrew, Simon Peter, James, and John in last Sunday’s Gospel reading.  Think what their relatives and friends must have thought when they went off to follow Jesus.  How did they know where he would lead them?  Why abandon a perfectly good (if not entirely stable) job as a fisherman to go off with this man?  Why, why, why?  It must have seemed the height of nonsense, just as sledding in the dark seems to me.

Perhaps they did it for the thrill of something out of the ordinary, at least at first, but I doubt they felt quite as excited once they realized Jesus faced opposition.  Nevertheless, they stayed with him, to the end in John’s case, and most of the Apostles died as martyrs, having come back to Jesus after the resurrection.

Jesus kept them coming back, just as the lure of the sledding hill keeps bringing the thrill-seekers back, even in the dark.  Do we have the courage to listen to Jesus’ call as much as we listen to the temporal urges and longings of our hearts?

Working through Changes

Life very rarely stays the same, which is a good thing.  Just imagine if nothing ever changed.  How boring would life be then?  But often in our lives, we can be resistant to change.  Adapting to changes, rolling with the punches, is a skill we have to learn as human beings.

Change often accompanies “milestone” life events – births, marriages, deaths, etc.  When my grandmother died, my parents spent almost nine months in California, getting her house ready to rent.  Truckloads of her possessions made the nearly thousand-mile trek from Santa Barbara to Salt Lake City.  We are still going through bits of it, almost nine years later.  In the act of going through her things, it brings back memories of her life, her mannerisms, her accent, and it brings a smile to our faces, so the change is not all bad.

Another big milestone is on the horizon for my family.  My brother will be getting married in May, and moving out of our family home.  He’s moved out before, when he went to college and then vocational school, but it wasn’t permanent.  There is a significant age gap between us, and to me, he’s always been my big brother, across the hall or just downstairs.  I can always depend on him to be there for me and for our parents.  Now, he will still be “there,” just not physically.  Again, this change won’t be all bad – I get a sister out of it, after all – but it will still be difficult.

Life will go on.  We will adapt.  And we will find a new normal.

When things change in your life, when you find it difficult to accept change, ask yourself:  How am I going to grow because of this change?  How can I be joyful through this change?  Do I need God’s help?  Have I asked for it?

Busy Weekends? Look for an Alternative

One of the odd things about working for the Church is you need to have “alternative weekends.”  Often, church employees work Sundays, and some also work Saturdays, so it is important for them to find other days during the week to take as a “weekend” instead.  It is particularly tricky for priests because they have daily obligations as a function of their vocation.  But, even priests should get a “day off” and vacation time.

Most of us who work for the parish have carved out our alternative weekends.  My weekend is typically Friday and Saturday.  Having worked in an environment that was very emotionally, mentally, and even physically taxing at times, I am pretty protective of my weekends.  Most of my evenings are taken up with a commitment of one kind or another as well, so I need to guard my time off.

In the United States, there is a culture of workaholism.  In order to live the American Dream we feel like we need to work all the time.  The sad part is that people sometimes have to work two or more jobs just to make ends meet.  So, we get in a mindset that if we aren’t working there must be something better to do with our time than just sitting around.  In fact, there is a certain amount of stigma aimed toward those seen to be “slackers” or taking advantage of the system.

The reality is that we live in a culture that glamorizes work to the point of pushing people toward mental and emotional breakdown, and we have developed this mindset in relatively recent decades.  That isn’t healthy.  That isn’t sustainable.  If you look at other cultures, they place value in people for their potential as human beings, not in their employability.  Quality of life is not determined by one’s ability to work, but by one’s opportunities for growth as a whole person.

Faith can be an important aspect of our lives that might be pushed aside in favor of work.  Make sure you are giving yourself the opportunity to rest and recharge.  Remember, Elijah heard God in “a light silent sound” (1 Kings 19:12 NABRE translation) or, as we may be more familiar, “a still small voice” (KJV translation), not in hubbub.  Give yourself a chance to be quiet and attentive to what God is trying to say to you.  If that means finding alternative weekends for yourself, make that a priority.  Your faith, as well as your body and your sanity, will thank you.

The Real Enemy

When we feel beaten up and we feel that we have had enough of life’s pain, sufferings and battles, we cry out in despair “When will I run out of enemies? When will my enemies leave me in peace?”

As Christians, the Lord never promised us a life without enemies. In fact, He seemed to be so sure that we will always have them that He advised us to simply love them. “Love your enemies,” the Lord said. He Himself had enemies. As good a man as Jesus was, He had the scribes and the Pharisees who always looked at Him with hatred and antipathy. Some of His countrymen saw in Him as someone who was not a friend of Caesar, a threat to the Roman Empire. Then there were enemies in His own circle of friends. Judas is not the only one, There was Peter who wanted to tempt the Lord and make Him run away from the cup of sacrifice. Finally there was the archenemy, the tempter in the desert who wanted Him to kneel down and worship the evil one.

We have our personal enemies and we also have national enemies. There are people who seem to have taken it to themselves to make life more difficult for us. It seems that there are some people who are troublemakers by nature. These are the kinds of people who will disagree with everything they see and hear. Their mission in life is to criticize. Their mission in life is to express their displeasure about everything. If you arrive at an agreement, these are the same people who will not be satisfied. They will continue to criticize the agreement and they will wait until it is proven wrong. In the end, they will say. “I told you so, I told you it would happen.” There are those who threaten our lives, our property and our security. There are those who tempt us into laziness, into greed and lust and dishonesty.

When all these people have been won over to our side, we still have to contend with the greatest enemy, the “SELF”. Our greatest enemy is the sinful self, the old self urges us to take the easy way out, the self that tells us to get over others, otherwise, they will make a fool out of you. It is the self that will choose hatred and revenge rather than forgiveness.

We also have enemies on the national level. We have terroristsreal or imagined. We have selfserving politicians and appointed public servants who have begun to like power and have become afraid of losing it. We have a taxation system that has become a load that the poor find impossible to carry. We have a government that opts to raise revenues by legalizing things immoral. We can lay the blame on our situation on all things and on all people and on all events of the past. But we will get nowhere unless we accept the blame on ourselves.

Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me. Let there be change in the society and let that change begin with me. Jesus won over all His enemies because He was true to Himself. We too can claim victory over all these enemies if we recognize the enemy within us that we have started to pamper and to protect and to safeguard.

"Nemo Dat Quod Non Habet"

I am humbled and at the same time grateful to God for the gift of priesthood. Last June 26, I celebrated my 11th year anniversary as priest and I honestly admit that it is only by God’s grace and mercy that I reached this point in my priesthood. I also thank nameless and countless people who pray for me and love me despite of my imperfections, mistakes, and sinfulness. 

In my priestly life, I always remind myself of this phrase: “Nemo  dat  quod  non  habet”  It  is  a  Latin  statement  which translates: “You cannot give what you do not have.” These words remind me of the author, Janet Ruffing. She said; “Unless  we experience  the  light  of  God’s  loving  touch,  we  remain  too frightened to enter into the fullness of life God offers.” This is very true in my own spiritual life! This theme truly runs at the center of my priestly ministry. The simple truth is that, it is impossible for an individual to bring God’s light and love if that individual does not know God, or simply decides to live in hate or chose to live a life without God.

 I would like to invite everyone to reflect and ask ourselves these questions: How can we guide somebody if we do not allow ourselves to be guided by someone? How could we completely love  another  person  if  we  have  not  yet  learned  how  to  love ourselves the right way? How could we truly value anyone around us if we haven’t truly valued ourselves? How can we trust others if we struggle to trust ourselves? How can we offer forgiveness, if we haven’t tried forgiving ourselves?

In our spiritual practices it seems difficult to think of our own selves first, because if we do, we can actually feel uncomfortable and somehow we come to believe it is selfish and selfserving. However, I believe  that  the  proper  care  for  oneself  in  the  aspects  of  physical,  emotional,  mental,  social, psychological and spiritual is of primary importance. I am not asking you to be selfcentered; I am simply asking you to take care of yourselves.

Jesus commanded us: Love your neighbor as you love yourself. This implies that there is nothing wrong or sinful in loving yourself. Love yourself so that you can love your neighbor in the right way. I believe that the principle of giving to oneself first is one of the important benchmarks in finding inner peace and creating successful relationships. “You can’t give what you do not have,” does not only apply to things. It also applies to love, trust, value, honor, belief and forgiveness. I believe that selfcare and the nurturing  of  self  is  the  groundwork  of  living  true  to  our  vocation,  our universal call to holiness.

If we learn to love ourselves in the right way, we can develop the ability  to  give  so  much  more  of  ourselves  to  others.  Learning  to  give ourselves the gift of love, acceptance, value, honor, trust and forgiveness makes it so much easier to give to those people we care about, without any hesitation and without any feeling of helplessness.