In the Midst of Turmoil, the World Still Turns

While it seems like most of the country, and to a certain extent, much of the world, has ground to a halt in the wake of COVID-19, life goes on.  It is helpful to try to maintain some sense of normalcy and routine.  Of course, there are differences.  Online and homeschool instruction for students.  Working from home, or finding oneself newly unemployed.  Trying to maintain contact with friends and family through different means than usual. 

And then, there are signs that life and time marches on.  People continue to get married.  People continue to have babies.  Birthdays still happen, regardless of how they are celebrated.  Anniversaries come and go.  Time waits for no one.

Maybe that is why my nephew and his fiancée decided to move their wedding to two months earlier than they originally planned.  They got married this past weekend in a private ceremony.  My brother and his fiancée intend to keep their planned wedding date in about a month, with a smaller private ceremony as well.  The only thing that really has to wait is the reception.

It is a good reminder for all of us that even though things are drastically different right now in some ways, in other ways, we continue on as we always have.  And this is also a chance for us to be grateful for all the things we tend to take for granted.  Who knows when we might wake up and those things are gone?

Working through Changes

Life very rarely stays the same, which is a good thing.  Just imagine if nothing ever changed.  How boring would life be then?  But often in our lives, we can be resistant to change.  Adapting to changes, rolling with the punches, is a skill we have to learn as human beings.

Change often accompanies “milestone” life events – births, marriages, deaths, etc.  When my grandmother died, my parents spent almost nine months in California, getting her house ready to rent.  Truckloads of her possessions made the nearly thousand-mile trek from Santa Barbara to Salt Lake City.  We are still going through bits of it, almost nine years later.  In the act of going through her things, it brings back memories of her life, her mannerisms, her accent, and it brings a smile to our faces, so the change is not all bad.

Another big milestone is on the horizon for my family.  My brother will be getting married in May, and moving out of our family home.  He’s moved out before, when he went to college and then vocational school, but it wasn’t permanent.  There is a significant age gap between us, and to me, he’s always been my big brother, across the hall or just downstairs.  I can always depend on him to be there for me and for our parents.  Now, he will still be “there,” just not physically.  Again, this change won’t be all bad – I get a sister out of it, after all – but it will still be difficult.

Life will go on.  We will adapt.  And we will find a new normal.

When things change in your life, when you find it difficult to accept change, ask yourself:  How am I going to grow because of this change?  How can I be joyful through this change?  Do I need God’s help?  Have I asked for it?

Change - It's Not Easy!

Nobody really likes change.  It upsets routine.  It makes us uncomfortable.  Luckily, as we grow up we develop coping mechanisms to help us through big changes in our lives. 

For several years, I worked with students who had autism.  Many people with autism struggle with change.  The slightest variation in schedule could throw off an entire day.  This is because, once one thing changes, their routine is off.  It becomes unpredictable.  They don’t know what to expect, and if they don’t have the skills to cope with that, it can lead to meltdowns or other behaviors that their caregivers would deem undesirable.  In these cases, it is important for teachers or caregivers to realize that it isn’t the student’s fault.  He or she is experiencing a BIG emotion, and they are dealing with it the way they know how.

Over time, all of us learn that feelings, no matter what they are, are valid.  We shouldn’t have to justify our feelings, but we do need to take responsibility for how we act on our feelings.  This is a learned skill for anybody, not just people who may be neuro-divergent.

Right now is a time of change for our parish community.  We have been in something of a state of flux for almost a year now, and it has not been easy.  We do need to realize, however, that this change in pastor is not only disrupting for us, but also for the incoming priest.  I would argue it is more disrupting for him.  We only need to meet one new person.  He has to meet an entire community of people.  As such, it is important for us to be understanding and patient, even though that might be difficult for us.

Join us after the 8:30 and 11:00 Masses on August 11th for a welcome reception, and introduce yourself to Father, and until then, keep him in your prayers!